We received this email from D's aunt in Winnipeg on Sasha's birthday.

Hi! Hope all is well with you. I expect you're getting ready for your trip to Malaysia. It is this coming weekend that you leave, isn't it?

Will you have a little party for Sasha or do they do something at her day care? Hard to believe she's only two. She's so bright and active. Give her a hug and kiss for me.

I think I've spent the last month just waiting for spring. Still lots of snow left - there is about 2 to 3 feet covering the perennial bed in the garden. It's suppoed to get as high as 9C today, but back to -2C tonight and only a high of 0C tomorrow and staying cool to the weekend. Went to a garden centre yesterday with sister, Anne. Just had to see some growing plants and flowers.

I was at Derek and Kristi's for Gordon's birthday. They have a gorgeous home! Gordon didn't look well - He said his hip was giving him a lot of pain (arthritis) and he certainly looked as tho' he was suffering. Poor guy. I think he'll be glad to get to a nice hot climate.

Have a wonderful time in Malaysia.

Love, Aunt Hilda

I had meant to respond but with the birthday arrangements, packing and travelling, I assumed D had done so because he checks his email 1000 times a day on his crackberry. I figured I would get back to her this week with profuse apologies. She is a stupendous lady who totally adores Sash so I figured it she would understand.

We were informed last night, rather late last night, that she passed away on Thursday. Worse still, the neighbours only found her yesterday but it is thought that she may have pased on Thursday. She was sitting on her couch and they only realised something was amiss when her papers were not picked up off her porch. Her only daughter, who lives in Calgary, will be flying in to Winnipeg in the next few days to sort out funeral arrangements. Sash and I will be flying in to Winnipeg on Tuesday morning while D will fly in on Wednesday morning as he is away until Tuesday. We will stay for a week as I think D has come to the realisation that work should not be a priority and that the call could have been regarding another closer member of the family. FIL thinks we should not trouble ourselves by flying back just for the funeral but he doesn't really understand. I feel gutted that I did not respond to her last email with even a one-liner thank you. D recalls not even bothering because it was as he termed "time wasting non work related email" (hence the whole re-prioratisation). Aunt H is, or was, the closest thing I had to a mother in law and she was absolutely, absolutely lovely. And she adored Sasha, always remembering her birthday, even our wedding anniversary. Making sure she had toys to play with whenever we visited her house even for half an hour. She joined us for my birthday dinner last year, and bought me thoughtful presents even on her rather limited pension. Her passing is a surprise to everyone because she was rather dynamic, and while she was 74, her Mum lived to the ripe old age on 94. We are still grappling with accepting that she is no longer around. This has, suffice it to say, a rather bittersweet Mothers Day.

Yea for customer service!

Gosh it has been a busy few days. Got home late Monday after an eternity on the train (where again Via Rail exceeded expectations with early boarding and economy class coaches...steward provided Sash with a blanket and pillow..and confused her by calling her pumpkin a few times...to which she replied.."I not pumkin. I Sasha!"). Took the subway home and stopped by the Sushi resto round the corner for some takeaway. Sash had a grand old time playing with her new found toys so it took us ages to put her to bed. The next morning we woke up rather disoriented, wondering where we were. It felt great being back in familiar surroundings!

Random thoughts about train travel:

I find it disturbing to hear the train whistle going off mid-travel. My initial thoughts: Is the train engineer warning someone off the tracks? Another train maybe? But a split second later I recall D telling me that it is a legal requirement for the engineer to toot the horn/whistle near every crossing. But does this stop me from worrying? Of course not. So during the 7 hour ride from QC to Toronto, I must have freaked out for 35 split seconds in total...

Unlike in planes, people tend to want to chat more. It may just be Canadians, but random strangers from 3 seats away would strike up conversations. Makes you long for the headphones used in planes mainly to avoid conversation with others...

We have spent the last few days running mundane errands like sending off the dry cleaning, stocking up the freezer and fridge, buying more flowers and plants to experiment with, starting a mini herb garden etc. And oh yes, making arrangements for yet another visit to Montreal in a few weeks for a conference. Yup, we are going there again. This time we will need a babysitter for Sash as both D and I will be presenting papers in the same session so I have been contacting the hotel and conference organisers to sort this out and carry out the necessary background checks. We will be driving this time as we need to stop by Kingston on the way back for another conference so at least we don't need to book tickets etc. Did I mention that Spring/Summer is conference season??

Since we arrived home, no less than 5 people, from my trusty neighbours to the check out girl at my local fruits and veggie shop, have encouraged me to take advantage of the Canadian Avent recall of BPA bottles. You see, after being criticized (or shall we say dragged through the mud) by consumers for their position with regards to the use of BPA in bottles, Avent has relented and offered to refund parents for Avent bottles returned to various stores, such as ToysRUs. The extent of their recall is amazing, full refunds even without receipts. So this morning I dug up my Avent bottles, which luckily I had not chucked out, and returned them for a credit of nearly 50 bucks. Full refund, no questions asked. I wonder what Avent will do with these hundreds and thousands of bottles returned throughout Canada (everyone is sending back their bottles!). They will not be introducing BPA free bottles until late Summer while I think (I am not sure whether it is a legal requirement or due to customer demand), Canadian stores are only stocking BPA-free plastic or glass bottles. As I was returning all 8 of my Avent bottles, there were many other parents using their refunds to purchase the BornFree or glass bottles. I wonder how Avent will recover from this? The funny thing is, design wise, I found Avent to be superior to the much more expensive bottles. It is a shame that their brand name is now associated (at least with the Mums that I come in contact with) with dangerous bottles and corporate arrogance. But I suppose the damage will only be contained in Canada as I read somewhere that the UK has only just started publicising this issue. In Malaysia, it seemed like business as normal. Perhaps the Canadian government is paranoid...but I am not one to complain because with the refund, I bought Sash a playset comprising a sandpit/pool with a picnic table and umbrella. I figure that will just about make up for the unnecessary hormones in her body. So if you are in Canada, dig up those bottles...

Quebec

We have been in Quebec for the past few days. We started our second leg of our Spring work/holiday with a train ride from Toronto to Montreal on Wednesday evening. It was my first Canadian train ride, similarly for Sasha. I must add that I am duly impressed. We dragged our luggage, Sasha's backpack and stroller onto the Eglinton subway station and connected with Via Rail at Union. We had booked the tickets online and we were able to get our tickets for both our outgoing and return journey from the ticket office in Union. The ticketing agent advised us to be at the gate 5 minutes before boarding and to request early boarding. We did as we were told but did not have to get hold of anyone to seek early boarding as the ticket master found us and directed us onto the train personally. There was another single mother with her 6 month old baby also boarding early and we chatted about how civilised the process was, in comparison to the early boarding for flights that inevitable turn into a mad rush by airmile card holders and parents with 15 year old kids. We arrived in Montreal close to midnight and headed straight for the Delta hotel, where we were being put up by the meeting organisers, only to be told that they had overbooked and they were going to help us get a room in another hotel. Now, in situations like this I find that you have a choice of either going apeshit, which is totally understandable considering the time and the toddler you have with you, or you can just go with the flow and ask what can be done. We chose the second option and they found us a room at the Ritz-Carlton Montreal, and paid for our room and taxi ride to get there. Alls well that ends well I guess. I do wonder though where the Ritz puts people up when they overbook. The next day we returned to the Delta where they also provided complimentary breakfast and room upgrade for our stay. I am liking this Montreal hospitality. After the meeting, which involved some Ministers and others from the research center, D informed me that Sash and I were invited to the dinner being held at a rather posh resto near the meeting venue. The food was gorgeous, and our daughter behaved beautifully. We were worried at first but hey, they invited us and presumably they would be prepared for a 2 year old and potential behaviour issues. I must say that Sasha does surprise us sometimes.

The next day, we rented a car and drove to Quebec City where D's co-authors live. They had invited us to stay at theirs for the weekend. Initially I was very reluctant because I think I know my mailman ...Rob, or Bob..something with an ob...better than I know JM and C. Also, they do not have kids and I am always weary of putting people out..especially when the kid they will host in their home is still jet lagged. But they were really keen to have us over and D needed to discuss some work with them. Also, I have never been to QC so I figured what the heck. And am I glad that we did come. They have been ever so hospitable and welcoming. They were initially worried that their home is not child friendly and offered to go out and buy some baby gates. You see, they live just outside of QC in a 3 story chalet set in the woods at the bottom of a ski hill, facing a gorgeous lake. It is such an idyllic setting that I cant even begin to describe how beautiful it is. I reassured them that Sasha is well aware of her limitations and that we will watch out for her. And boy does Sasha love the house. The house has a wrap around deck on the third floor where JM and C hang a multitude of bird feeders that inevitable attract all sorts of wild life. Sash has been sitting on the deck all day pointing out the yellow and red birds, the woodpeckers, the squirrels and the rabbit. JM and C are originally from Northern France so we have been having French style meals, such as steamed lobster, steaks and salads served ever so simply with bread, but with a rustic style that is just so sincere. We visited Old QC yesterday and I honestly feel like I should be using Euros instead of the Canadian dollar. I have heard that Montreal is very European, but I find QC to be even more so. I now totally understand the separatist movement as I keep having to remind myself that I am in Canada. Toronto seems a continent away.

After a weekend of visiting hitorical sites, hiking, and eating, we head back home tomorrow morning. We are taking the train as the 8 hour drive would have been just too tiring. Although it will take longer by train, D and I are both in agreement that we don't really enjoy road trips by car and we much prefer to spend the equivalent hours seated in a train with WiFI access. I cant wait to get home to my own bed. On Tuesday, we start getting Sasha back into her old routine..wish us luck.

It is 9.52am and I have been awake since 2.30am. Sash slept pretty soon after coming home from daycare at 5.30pm yesterday and woke up fresh as a daisy at 2.30am. I was able to persuade her to stay in bed until about 4.30 when her Daddy woke up, which she took as license to get up and play. We decided then that we might as well start the day so prepared our coffee, bagels and mangoes for breakfast. We had to keep reminding Sash that the sun was sleeping and it is dark so we could not go outside. She remained by the glass door licking the door while waiting for the sun to rise. So now in addition to having to pack for another trip I have to Windex the window.

She asked for chicken at 6.30am and a few minutes ago asked for pizza. Now, chicken I am prepared for, but pizza? I had to make do and toasted a piece of bread with cheese and spread some ketchup on top. She actually ate half of the rather dodgy concoction. She must be as tired as I am.

D is in the office grading some papers. Funny, I used to think that my exam results in Uni were mainly based on the amount of effort I put in, the hours of studying and regurgitating. I now realise that it very much depends on the grader, in that if he has a kid with jet lag at home, the person taking the exam is pretty much screwed.

MsJ, a fellow blogger and great friend has commented that I do not look preggers. For the record, that pic of D and I at the massage pavilion in the Andaman was taken pre-buffet breakfasts and bucket loads of local delicacies. Allow me to illustrate..



The picture above was taken on the day of our arrival....0 buffet breakfasts, 1 plate Cantonese style fried rice and ice cold water.



Fast forward to 3 buffet breakfasts, 2 Andaman burgers, 1 tepanyaki dinner, 2 6 course set dinners(lamb/norwegian salmon)at The Restaurant; 1 set meal at the Gulai House and copious amounts of carrot/apple and watermelon juices. This was taken at the Datai poolside while waiting for yet another set meal to commence 9we ran out of places to eat at our own resort). PD started kicking about that time...possibly to get the food out of the way. The kid was probably wondering what the hell happened to a bagel a day for breakfast...



Fast forward to 6 more buffet breakfasts (only a pregnant woman is able to pile on waffles next to hokkien style noodles and an omelette and get a smile a from other guests), 2 more Japanese dinners, A Thai feast, bucketfulls of nasi lemak (coconut rice with trimmings), and whatever Malaysian delicacy and voila..I am obviously and truly preggers...I am going on diet and hopefully by August I will lose at least 9 pounds..hahahahaha.

Hell on earth is being jet lagged. Hell in hell is having to entertain a jet lagged 2 year old while jet lagged.

We arrived home at 2.30 am, dumped our luggage and tried to sleep. Sash couldn't, so we couldn't. We gave up by 5.30am and had an early breakfast in the sunroom, looking out into our green and transformed garden. We still cannot believe that when we left there was a few feet of snow on the ground. The neighbours have been asking how Sash was during the long flights, especially the practically continuous KL-HK-Vancouver-TO leg back home. We told them she surpassed expectations. Well, if one expects ones kid to have an ear infection and scream all 20 hours that is. I believe when you have low expectations, it can only get better from point zero. No, seriously, she was pretty excellent during the flights. We only had to use the Dora DVDs in the middle of the HK-Vancouver leg, she ate some of the kiddie meal, slept alot, decorated her screen and seat belt with stickers that her Auntie Dora gave her, and did not puke once. Did I mention in my earlier posting that she puked twice on our way to HK from Vancouver and also in a taxi in HK (with it being 32 degrees, it was a special kind of nasty)? We took her off milk then...unfortunately, she has refused to drink milk since. Our section during the HK-Vancouver flight was filled with Aussies on holiday, and I think we were as apprehensive of them as they were of Sash. Upon landing those around us told us that she behaved beautifully, and if I wasn't so sleepy I would have extended them the same compliment. Again, I am kidding. I get sarcy-funny this way when I am seriously deprived of sleep. Sash's world has gone topsy turvy, hence our world follows suit. She is wide awake at night and really perks up at 3am. This morning, at 4.30 she declared her hunger and wanted chicken. D finally sent her to day care at 8am. It may be unfair to inflict a jet lagged Sash on J, but I need to get some sleep and get the laundry done because we have to pack for our next trip to Montreal and Quebec City on Wednesday. As usual we have left the travel arrangements far too late and it will cost a bomb to fly or take a train, so we will probably drive it. I hate long flights, but I detest long drives. The last time we took a road trip with Sash was when we were house hunting in TO and driving up from NY every other weekend. It was tough with an 11 month old then, it will be brutal with a 2 year old I imagine. Again, think bad thoughts, think bad thoughts.

Sash misses her Tot, Nenek, Puteh, Baby, Maya (Tot's 3 cats) and Auntie Dora..in that order..ok, to be brutally honest, she misses the cats and then Tot..sorry Tot (or Tok). At 11.30 to past Midnight, as I was seriously contemplating asking the docs for toddler appropriate sleeping pills, she was singing Jingle Bells and meowing over and over again, looking for Puteh in the basement.



I think we need a holiday after this holiday.

It is our last day in Andaman. I would say Langkawi but due to FIL's physical constraints, we have for the most been staying close to home. Not that I am complaining in any way as I have been here enough times to want to appreciate the resort life, and with the Canadian dollar being as high as it is, massages and mocktails don't seem horrifically expensive. I am a Malaysian who finds it shocking that a nasi lemak (rice cooked in coconut milk with condiments) can cost Ringgit 31 when I can get it for RM3 at normal outlets. D really enjoyed the Canopy Tour as he is now able to tell Sasha that he can do a "Diego". Diego is Dora's animal rescuer cousin who lives in the rain forest and swings from tree to tree occasionally. We figured I could have been able to undertake the tour if I wanted to, but since FIL wont even let me slide down the water slide (something about same reason I am not allowed to water ski, water in punani, premature labour...didnt want to ask for details), chances are he would have vetoed the abseiling and flying foxing across a gorge.

We miss Sasha terribly and have decided that there will be no more holidays without her. She is enjoying herself with her Tok, Nenek, Aunties Dora and ED, learning new Malay words and torturing the cats, and we figure she may be having more fun than us. Unfortunately we can only see her tomorrow afternoon as we have a presentation at the stock exchange tomorrow morning and it would be cruel to take her away from her comfortable surroundings just to stick her with an unfamiliar babysitter early the next morning (just as we do every time we travel for work). We have saved some origami from the 2 Japanese dinners we had as a present for her. She has enough T-shirts. Our eco guide tells us that there is a 2 meter resident monitor lizard living on the resort grounds. My mission today is to find it. Right after I have my last buffet breakfast..and lounge by the pool a bit.

It is raining heavily outside. I am in the room after having a rather heavy buffet breakfast with FIL and lounging by the poolside as he slept in his room. He was up the whole night with the runs so after taking a couple of tranquilizers (beauty of being an MD is that self medication is not frowned upon and you have access to cool pills) he has been in dreamland since breakfast. D is on a rainforest canopy tour, absailling down some tree I suppose. I am as expected not allowed to do such things due to my pregnancy. Yet another fun activity I have to refrain from...but I guess if the baby has to float in water without any outside stimulation for 9 months, I should not complain too much. I have just finished The Other Boleyn Girl. I have learned that it is best to read books that you dont mind losing or getting wet on holidays...disposable books. And this definitely was. I am however going to look for some more historically correct books on the subject as it has piqued my interest.

We had dinner the The Dining Room, Datai last night. We are running out of restaurants to try but the food so far has been exceptional. When FIL informed me of his runs, I initialy felt guilty, being official tour guide, host and all. But then after that split second, I figured he hasnt eaten anything I have cooked myself so his condition really isn't my fault. Still, I feel bad for him because I remember getting the runs in India and it is an experience I would not wish for my worst enemy.

I seem to be unable to download any pictures. I suppose there are drawbacks to Island living.

Pensionistas

I cannot believe it has been 10 days since we left TO. So much happening in the past 10 days that I am in that proverbial blogger conundrum...not having time to blog when there is just too much to blog about. I shall try my best to provide little excerpts...

Last night, we decided to have Tepanyaki dinner in the Andaman resort Japanese restaurant. When we were seated the 5 occupants of the other seats nodded politely and sipped their sake. We were not about to give up this opportunity to have a chat with people other than ourselves, so we set about asking questions. How did they decide on Langkawi as a holiday destination? Where are they from? The 3 women on our left, self described Pensionistas (love this new term), were from Germany and instead of the usual girls night out, they travel the world for weeks on end. One chatted with D about his favourite German city, while I had a discussion with another about our Indian experiences. The couple on our right were from Estonia and they chatted with D's dad about the Bolsheviks and the culture in Bali. Globalization at its best.

We arrived in Langkawi yesterday afternoon and D's dad (FIL)finds it difficult to reconcile the modernity and pace of Kuala Lumpur with the lush tropical rain forests and the pristine beaches surrounding Andaman resort. He has always found D to be the more travelled of all his kids, and I sense that he has taken pride in the fact that a kid from Winnipeg has chosen a unique lifestyle that involves moves across continents and, how shall I say this nicely, a distinctly exotic wife (ehm, ehm)...but I think now that he has visited Malaysia and Hong Kong with us, he sees D's travels and life from a whole new perspective, in that what he finds astonishing, D takes forgranted. He marvels at D's adaptability in situations and I suppose his worldly outlook. He has had a glimpse into our lives and commented that "this is a far cry from Winnipeg". I don't think he sees D as the baby of the family anymore.

During our plane ride from KL to Langkawi Island, there was a baby sitting with us in Business Class. And he cried most of the 55 minute flight. There were a quite a few irate passengers, who I guess, unlike us, paid good money to get away from that element. We on the other hand cashed in airmiles and had just left our 2 year old daughter with her doting grandparents for the duration of our week long holiday. We were just relieved to hear a baby cry, and it wasn't ours. It was kind of nice in a perverse sort of way to just sit back and sip our drinks...

D, FIL and I enjoyed a massage this afternoon. I had the pregnancy massage, which just means I was not able to have the aromatherapy oils, the post massage tonic and no squishing of tummy. D and FIL had the full on aromatheraphy massage. The spa is situated within the rain forest, and we were massaged while facing the Andaman Sea. Life doesn't get better than that. It was pricey but then when else will we all be back together in Langkawi to enjoy such an experience. One of my greatest regrets in life (and I do not have many) is not splurging on the hot air balloon ride over the fairy chimneys in Capadocia, Turkey, thinking that it was a bit to much for my budget at that time. My chances of going back there with 2 kids in tow are pretty slim now.

I have decided to rent a car and take FIL around the island tomorrow morning, take in the gondola ride up the mountain and have lunch at Bon Ton, my favourite restaurant. He thinks we should take a hotel limo because he is not overly confident with my driving abilities. Neither am I actually as I have not driven a car for 2 years...but then hey, I say this is part of the adventure. As long as I remember that the driver's side is closest to the line in the middle of the road we should be fine.


On the way back to Kuala Lumpur, we stopped in Hong Kong for a couple of days. We spent one day at Disneyland Hong Kong. Well, half a day as it is rather small....actually maybe even 4 hours. I liked Disneyland HK. It is probably an absolute waste of time for anyone over the age of 5 as there are hardly any rides that older children would enjoy, but as a parent of a two year old that recognizes Mickey Mouse only from the front of her diaper, it is perfect. The wait times for rides was 10 minutes, compared to 2 hours at North American Disneylands. It was less commercialised. But then this may be because Sash is too young to be an avid consumer so we did not buy her a single souvenir. Oh wait, we bought her a rain cover. Because it was drizzling at one point. It was dead easy to get there by MRT (underground transit) and at the Sunny Bay station, we boarded a special train which had Mickey shaped windows and other Mickey related decor. It was an interesting expeience. Been there, done that, did not have to buy the overpriced T-shirts.

When I am pregnant, I find the baby doesn't irritate me in the least. It is everyone else around me. Today, I am irritated with my obgyn and D. My obgyn for telling me to sleep on my side from here on as there is some sort of vein that connects to the placenta or something in there that effects blood supply to baby...whatever it is all I heard during the consult was "sleep on your side to ensure proper blood supply"...which I don't normally do as I sleep on my back. I know she is trying to help but I figure the baby should work with me on this and also move his position instead of me moving mine for the next few months. Seriously, if he wants more oxygen, work for it baby. D because he has taken it upon himself to remind me at least 3 times a night that the baby needs blood/oxygen...every time he wakes up to see what Sasha wants and any other time he wakes up himself and finds me on my back. To do this, he wakes me up and nags...ok, he reminds me of what obgyn said..but at 2.30am, it is irritating . At 3.30 am, it is a bloody nuisance. By 5.30am I just tell him to bugger off. But I change positions anyway...

The loot

This morning, I had Sash go around to her friends' houses and thank them for celebrating her party with her. She passed along (rather reluctantly I must add) a little loot bag which is not exactly filled with a bunch of loot, but a stuffed animal I bought at Ikea (I so love this shop now especially since we discovered one less than 15 minutes away) along with athank you card attached. As there were only 4 children at the party, I decided to make the cards myself instead of buying the pre-printed pack of 12 and chucking out 8 (like I did the invitations). The bags themselves are also adult friendly and can be reused for occasions other than child related. I admit, along with being too lazy to figure out what to stuff in the loot bags, I find that when Sash receives one of these I will always have to go through it to take out age inappropriate toys and candy, while she looks on screaming MINE MINE. I did not want to put my neighbours through that...especially after sugar infusing their kids last Saturday. Sugar is such a no-no here. It is, I think, thought of along the same vein as crack cocaine. Parents joke about being sugar nazis, but in a serious way.



I admit that I myself tend to limit it to weekends and special occasions but it is difficult because D and I dont only have a sweet tooth, we have the whole freakin set. He has to have something sweet for dessert after dinner, while I melt at the sight of Choc Choc Chip. So to balance our guilt (both ways for giving in and not giving in), we limit her intake to chocolates only on weekends, and only when she asks really really nicely. We do not reward her good behaviour with chocolates, but with stickers instead. She is not allowed candy or candy bars, only good, preferably dark 70% or milk chocolates. She is allowed only one cookie, but she can have as many crackers as she wants. She should consider herself lucky though because one of her friends at her party was allowed, for the first time ever, a chocolate cupcake with icing removed. She is not allowed ANY sugar at all. I think D would die if he didnt have any sweets in the house...

Spring is here at last

The weather today is just glorious, glorious, glorious at 15 degrees and extremely sunny. We have spent every moment possible outdoors, just going to the park, then walking along Yonge with the excuse of stocking up Sasha's summer clothes and the local nursery to buy trays of pansies. Sasha insisted on wearing her winter jacket, but also her sunglasses. And of course she had to carry Dini and her new bag of Mini Mr Potato men which she received as a birthday present. Met a couple of other neighbours at BabyGap/Nursery doing the exact same thing. While Sasha took her nap I planted the pansies in the 3 new planters we bought at Ikea last week. Our old planters burst from the accumulated snow and freezing temperatures..and of course our failure to ensure proper drainage. No danger of that happening this time because I used our drill to drill extra holes at the base of our new planters. At last, some colour to greet us when we get home..if they survive.



No sign of crocuses or tulips in our flower beds, and this may be because it is still too early, or the squirrels have dug up all the bulbs. Probably the latter. It is still pretty muddy out back, with the snow still melting. An excellent excuse to wear our very cheery wellies.



As I type this D is BBQing our dinner. Steak for us, chicken for Sasha. After dinner, we have to head out to the drugstore to stock up on diapers for the trip. Anything else I can get in KL, but I find the diapers there, albeit the same brand make, very different. They fit differently and they do not hold as much. Also need her Tylenol and cough mixture, just in case. Once we have packed for Sasha, we can start thinking about our own packing. I don't know about other families, but I find it surprising that someone who is 1/3 our size takes up 3 times our luggage space..combined. I just usually bung whatever I find into a suitcase and zip it up. Travelling with a 2 year old involves deciding on what she will wear to airport (warm layers, no jacket (too bulky) but not too warm as she will be in the taxi/train), which pyjamas she will wear on the plane (footed as she will be walking along), slippers (for walking in the lounge), spare clothing in case of pee leak and/or vomit (a set for every 5 hours of travel time), 1 diaper for every 2 hours on plane (not forgetting layover and potential delay time)...basically, double the amount, wipes, plastic bags to dispose of diapers and wipes, books, Dora DVDs, headphones for laptop, Dini (and now mini Mr Potato heads), snacks, spare bottles, sippy cup, pacifiers, pain killers (less than 100ml), pashmina to be used by either Sash or D as a blanket, socks and spare socks, flash cards, and other odds and ends, including spare clothing for D and I in event she pees/vomits on us (and this has happened). Items have to be divided between diaper bag and hand luggage, depending on accessibility. Lets not talk about her luggage, with clothing, ladybug night light, books, shoes, bottles, medication in quantities above 100ml, bath time necessities, sunblock, hats, swimsuits, and the list goes oooonnnn...I feel that it takes 2 weeks to prepare and pack for this 2 week trip...sigh. I should not complain though. We will soon be in the happiest place in China...

Sasha's Birthday Brunch

We have been getting Sasha ready for her party for the past few days, reminding her that she has to share her toys, and to play nice. We dressed her this morning in an outfit she received as a gift from Doug's Aunt and Uncle about a year ago. She loved the balloons and the decorations but was more interested in the confectionary tower. The brunch was quite a success, if I do say so myself (patting self on back). The adults enjoyed the fruits, waffles and breakfast sausages and more importantly the kids had fun just playing together. The cupcakes were a hit, especially since I forced the guests to take the leftovers home. If I am going to have a sugar infused kid at home, so are they! Sasha has had cupcakes 3 days in a row, so her annual quota of sugar has pretty much been achieved.





Sash really liked the Belgian chocolate animal lollipops that were stuck on each cupcake. I must add that I really liked them too.











Happy birthday our darling little angel!!

The thing about having an übersexual as a husband, is that he can sometimes be irritatingly sensitive. Admittedly, sometimes it comes in handy. I have not felt the baby kick at all, but D who now sleeps with his hand on my tummy (which is another rant-y post altogether), reassures me that PD is most active in the morning as he feels more kicks. As I still cannot differentiate my digestive movements from PDs, I usually get D to confirm whether he is still alive before I go to sleep. I had to ask the ultrasound technician to label and specifically point out parts we were checking as the whole screen was just a blur and a blob to me. D however could pick out the spine and the heart beating. D has so far asked me 5 times (I keep count of such irritations) how it feels like to be pregnant. He has mentioned many times that he wishes he could experience it, even for a day (and I often wish that he is the one pregnant too). He wants to know if I go around having that "Magical-glow-knowing-I-am-creating-life" feeling, if I feel, I don't know, stupendous or something. I am however the wrong person to ask such questions. I explained to him that I dont really feel any differently except for specific moments in time when I cannot bend over to tie my shoelaces, or when I find diffficulty in reaching over the sink to wash dishes. Other than that, nada. Well, I do feel fat if that makes him feel better. He will press on and ask if I feel the baby growing, and how that feels. By this time my irritation starts to show and I tell him that it pretty much feels like when you have poo build up to the size of a bowling ball for 9 months..but no pain involved. Other than that, I cannot explain it because I don't feel different. He then gets upset that I am not more poetic about my situation. I tell him that the poo analogy is about as poetic I will ever be. I really wish scientists would try to figure out how to get men pregnant already...just to save me others like me from such irritating questions. Funny, D will not ask what it feels like to pass said bowling ball out..I suppose sensitivity has its limits.

His sensitivity has reached new heights this evening as he was informed by Air Canada that his flight from Philly tonight has been cancelled and they have put him on a flight tomorrow morning..and if that flight isnt delayed he might just make her birthday brunch. If it is delayed, then he will miss her birthday party. He is freaking out because this might be the case. I am freaking out because I may have to entertain our guests on my own, and make waffles. Sash is freaking out because she has had 3 cupcakes (well, the icing) today. To calm ourselves down, we threw a ball to each other. She would throw it, I say thank you, she says you're welcome and it's my turn, I would throw it back, she would catch it, giggle hysterically, say thank you, I would say you're welcome, and this was repeated over and over again for 30 minutes. I gave her a bath, read 4 books and she fell asleep. I am going to turn in now and if all goes well, D will be back bright and early tomorrow...if not.....

Sasha turned 2 at 4.12pm this afternoon. I can't believe it has been 2 years since I first met her. 2 years of her many many firsts..her first bottle, her first spoonful of solid food, her first step, her first plane/train/gondola ride, her first word (which was Dada, dagnabbit) and her first sentence. Every day we see slight changes in her. She is more willful, yet this shows she is beginning to make choices. She throws tantrums, but this signals that she wants to communicate and is frustrated when she cannot get her point across. She is more manipulative, but this is a sign of maturity. This week she loves purple. She insists on wearing her purple trousers, her purple shirt and purple shoes. I took her shopping for shoes and after trying on the many pairs that I preferred, she chose a pair that she liked, which I am not too keen on. But hey, I choose my battles. She is showing empathy. She is concerned when her friends take a tumble and will go up to them and ask "Are you OK?" She can now climb and slide down the "big kids" slide all by herself. She is still not keen on the swings though. She is learning to recognise the alphabets and numbers. She is, all 36 3/4 inches and 25.14 pounds of her, a perfectly healthy, happy and well adjusted young lady. And for that I am ever so grateful.

She is also going to have a little brother. On the anniversary of her birth, we found out that the baby is a boy, he has 1 in 23,000 chance of having downs syndrome and 1 in 29,300 chance of having spinal issues (this is good apparently although I am still trying to determine if this is based on Canadian, North American or Worldwide data) so I will not have to undergo an amniocentesis, and that it is 20 weeks. We asked the ultrasound technician if she is positive about the sex, and she showed us this...



So yes, it is definitely going to be a boy. I had to ask if the size is normal as it doesnt seem to scale to me...seriously...dont you think that it may be a tad large? I mean I realize that the camera adds 10 pounds but I have this fear that PD may turn into King Kong Dong or the like...touch wood. But my ob/gyn says that it is a normal size...I dunno, but I guess I have to take her word for it. D has of course downloaded the scan on his blackberry and is telling everyone how research finds that children inherit the Mum's intelligence...and well, boys inherit other..ehm..traits from their fathers.

Other than opening a few cards and some DVDs we bought for her (more so for the long plane ride than her birthday), we are saving the celebrations for tomorrow and Saturday as D is away at a conference. She will be celebrating her birthday with her daycare friends tommorrow and her neighbourhood friends on Saturday. She will definitely have more fun this birthday than her last...dont they grow up so fast?

Sash finally met her pediatrician this afternoon. As per standard procedure, I was asked who referred the practice. I told the receptionist I Googled them. The doctor, DF, is probably 90 years old so he was very surprised that he can be found on the internet. He asked me how I settled on him specifically. I told him I found his name on a list of pediatricians on the College of Physicians and Surgeons of Ontario website, he passed a criminal check and his office is 3 blocks away. As far as I am concerned, he is as good as any other in this socialist system. And I was right. He reassured me that in view of Sasha's maternal genes, she is not likely to be a huge eater. Give her vitamins and make sure she eats at least some meat for iron. She is still in the top 75% for height and so in view of the fact that she has presumably put on some weight since birth, she was given the all clear. He gave her Hepatitis A shots, and she didnt even cry....what a trooper. He asked about Malaria in Malaysia, and I reassured him that we were not about to go traipsing in the jungle. So no Malaria medication for her but she has to see DF again when she is home. My instinct tells me he's one of the good guys.

Alexandra Stoddard wrote about the 5-percent rule. That's when most people concentrate their energies on things that are for special occasions rather than the things that we do or use everyday....or 95% of the time. I used to do this, although it further translated to my saving things for special occasions. Saving the nice soap for a special occasion, the nice plates for visitors, buying only the good cheese for parties. Upon realization a few years ago that I was spending 95% of my life anticipating some later joy, I decided that I would consciously try to make every day a special day. When I receive nice soap or shower gels as gifts, I use them immediately. D bought some hand made soap from Cambridge recently, and every morning when I use a bar I think of the market where we used to have our lunch sarnies from Marks and Sparks. I now use the "guest" towels because, well, we on average we have guests stay with us once every 9 months and why have such nice fluffy towels collecting dust in the linen closet. When we feel like splurging, we head for the nice cheese shop round the corner and buy some nice Stilton we have yet to try, some tasty crackers made on some farm in BC and enjoy them with some nice vino...just us, just for the heck of it. We sometimes eat our dessert on our "nice" plates. Mind you, we only really have 8 nice plates (and salad ones at that) that D bought for me when we were in Amsterdam for my defence. The rest of our "china" are cheaper than cheap (white set of plates, salad bowls, cups and saucers etc for 8, on sale, $12)...and literally Chinese. We do use nice cutlery as I find nice, heavy cutlery really makes a meal. We drink our morning coffee from nice mugs. We only have 2 nice mugs though, as it doesn't really make sense to buy a whole set of 6 or 8 when we only need 2. We do have other mugs for guests, you know the ones you get for Xmas that says "Santa only comes once a year...aren't you glad you're not him". These we reserve for guests. Hey, they can lump it or leave it. I wear my jewelry (aren't all jewelry nice??) every day because I don't see the point of having them stored in our safe deposit box while wearing costume (which can be expensive too)...I follow the cost per wear rule. I don't splurge on unnecessary things, but neither do I put off enjoying nice things (and nice, pretty and enjoyable doesnt mean expensive..for example fresh flowers) as I may be hit by a bus/tram tomorrow...and I can so imagine looking down (or up) from where I am and thinking...DAMMIT, I should have opened that bottle of L'Occitanne shower gel!!

We are beginning to realize that Sash is getting to that stage where she can not only have a fairly decent conversation with us, but she can also put forward her views. For example, when shown a picture of a Lily, she will adamantly tell us that it is Not a Lily, but a flower...or that an eggplant is Not an egg...(I gave up on that argument). I think we have a lawyer on our hands...

We woke up this morning to another sunny yet brisk day. Before running a few errands, we decided to have a leisurely breakfast and tried out our new waffle maker. Love it, and love the waffles it makes! Took 3 minutes to mix the batter, and another 2 to make a waffle. We had them with fresh strawberries and banana, topped with maple syrup and whipped cream. This machine will definitely be used ALOT!

We walked to Melonheads where Sasha had her first big girl haircut. I must say I am rather impressed with the set up and the service. Sash could have chosen to sit on a horse, in a fire engine, in a train or in a helicopter while she had her hair cut. This being her first time though she was rather apprehensive so she preferred to sit with D. He read her a book while she had her first haircut. She was a trooper during the whole ordeal!





To commemorate her first haircut, she of course received a certificate and locks of her hair. Yet again, I am stumpped with this need to to certify. D of course immediately placed it in his special cabinet along with Sasha's crafts and other certificates. Yes, he has his own special Big wooden cabinet!





After her haircut, we set out on a quest for the doubles kit for our primary stroller. We use a Phil and Ted E3 stroller, which we love X10 and we needed to get the doubles kit, which will enable us to use it for both Sash and PD. Unfortunately, they have come out with a new sports model so it is difficult to get the accessories for the E3. We lucked out and found one in the apple green colour that we have at a shop nearby. As we found the service to be helpful and the salesperson knowledgable, we also decided to get a new travel system for PD as Sash pretty much used the one we have to death. Sash used the Combi which I liked but D didnt. We found one one that we both liked. The umbrella stroller reclines, is light enough and folds compact with one hand, which is crucial when you have a line of people waiting to board the plane. The car seat can also be extracted by using one hand. All in all a productive day....

We will be joining in Earth Hour tomorrow night. From 8-9pm we plan to switch off the lights (and the computer), spark the candles that we seem to have so many of, and ...well, that's as far as the plan goes currently. No idea what we are going to do during the hour with Sash...oh yes, and have rolls and sashimi for dinner, in the whole using less energy mood. We might not put too much of a dent on our carbon footprint in that one hour, but at least we can irritate Sash with stories of how we used to study by candlelight, how TV was black and white way back then, and well, just regaling her with stories of life before HD television. You guys in?

We are trying to get Sasha's room in order before her birthday. So far we have nailed her art up on the walls and I have stuck on the decals we bought her a while back.


She doesnt have a proper bed yet as she sleeps on a box spring and double mattress only, hence the cushion head guard.









We just need to get off our arses and head out to Home Depot for some shelves and it should be done. Then we have to start on PD's room. This may sound strange, but I am not the one instigating all this. D is. If you have read some of my posts, you will be aware that D is more emotionally involved in this sort of home decor thing. I am not saying that I dont care about my surroundings, but he just cares significantly more than I do. So I tend to give in to what he wants, like big wooden furniture, or the arrangement of his daughter's room. I just handle the more micro issues, such as the height placement of the painting to deter Sasha from licking it (she has this nasty habit of licking things..snow, store windows, bus stop walls...yup, her immunity against urban germs must be way up there by now) and the placement of her future book shelves to ensure that she is able to reach the books. He will also be in charge of PDs room because the only requirement I have is that the diaper pail be close to the changing table. Other than that the man has carte blanche....good luck to PD..

I had a chat with my sister-in-law a few days ago. I think it was over the Easter weekend. We decided to call her as we were eating our massive slices of Blueberry pie as they inevitably reminded us of J. During the Summer, she took care of Sash for a week while we flew off to Warwick for a conference, and she took Sash blueberry picking every day. Each and every picture of Sash taken during that week had her face and butt absolutely covered in blueberries. When we arrived back at the cottage after a long flight from Heathrow via Toronto, via Winnipeg and a 3 hour drive to the cottage, we found Sash crawling around chasing runaway blueberries with her Granpa trailing after her with a broom. J mentioned that she and her dot L will be starting their March/Spring break this week. I was a bit confused because D had just finished his. J explained that in Canada the provinces stagger the school breaks. This is to avoid overcrowding at the few tourist and ski hills that they have, and also enables parents to book holidays. This may not be overly convenient for extended families across provinces to get together, but then for a majority of families, this is not an issue. I thought that this was rather smart. In Malaysia, I recall avoiding any holiday destination during the school holidays because of the hotels charging peak rates, that is if you can even get a room. I think now you have to book a year in advance! Why have the States not thought about staggering the school breaks, to give parents a break??

xxxxxx

Sash had her last Kidnasium class for the Winter session yesterday. I don't think I will be signing her up for the Spring session as we will be away in KL/Montreal/Quebec City for a large chunk of Spring. Also, why have her running like a maniac indoors and pay for this privilege when she can be doing the same thing outdoors for free. After the class, when the certs were being handed out (I don't know why they do this. Am I going to frame it up? I don't think so), a nanny asked me how old Sash is. I told her 2 in April. She told me her charge, Leo, turned 2 last week and said Sash was "big" in the "I am trying to figure out if your kid is a freak" kind of way(But then I am hormonal so I may be imagining things). I ignored her ..I mean seriously, I didnt make a single comment about that honker of a nose your kid has, so why not return the compliment??!! I have been noticing her at the classes as she speaks French to Leo. She then asked me if I lived near the gym. I told her which street I lived on. She said "What? That's my street? What number?" I gave her the number. She said "Are you sure!! That's my number!" And for a second, a nano-second even, I actually thought "Hmmm, maybe that isn't my number..". I snapped out of that mode pretty quickly and re-assured her that that was indeed my number. Turns out she just moved in next door. She said that the family is renovating their new home..gave me address...up and coming neighbourhood..and have rented the house from Mexicans for 5 months. I explained that B and wife are not Mexicans but they have a third home in Mexico where the winter (and a cottage North of TO where they Summer). I welcomed her to the neighbourhood. I am thinking of inviting the family over for Sash's brunch, to get to know the gang or more importantly the kids. They have an older daughter who goes to the Toronto French School and I am sure that while we will probably never be able to afford the tuition (Nursery, 2 hours a day: 11 grand; Kindergarten: 21 grand; Grade school: 25 grand per annum (not including 5 grand Registration fee (and that is NOT the most Elite school)) it will be interesting to find out what they do there. But D wonders about the change in dynamics (I think he has been hanging with the wifeys too much)..so we shall see. The good news is that should we ever decide to go on sabbatical, we have the option of renting our home out as there seems to be a market among people renovating their homes...

xxxxxx

We file our US and NY State taxes today, and are looking into filing our Canadian taxes this week. Tax season is scary...

Freecycling, the new recycling

I freecycled today. I have been a member of Freecycle TO for a while, and although I occasionally look through the listings to check out any interesting offers, I have not bothered to contact anyone to ask for any of the interesting things I see. Also, having a teeny-weenie house keeps me pretty disciplined. For those unclear of the concept, the Freecycle Network (TM) is a Yahoo group set up in various cities (originating in Arizona I think), open to all who want to "recycle" something that is still fairly usable rather than throwing it away or selling it. Its main aim is to keep things from the landfills as long as possible. So, this morning I posted an offer for a DVD player that we have. Its tray has gone on strike and will not eject. We bought a new one so instead of just chucking it in the garbage, I posted an offer. Within a couple of hours I received 5 emails asking if he/she could have it as he/she will be able to repair it. I am free to choose whomever I deem best suited to accept my "gift" so I chose the one that sent the longest email. She will be picking up the DVD from my porch this afternoon during her lunch break. I think I will be freecycling more often in the future.

After Sasha's Kidnasium session this morning (I still find overenthusiastic grandmums/dads extremely irritating (but I am hormonal)...for Gods sake people, no need to clap and cheer like its the Olympics, the kid is only crawling through the tunnel!!), I walked up a couple of blocks to this shop to order a bunch of cupcakes for Sasha's birthday brunch. I figured cupcakes are much easier as no knives are involved, I don't have to subject my daughter to the trauma of Mummy decapitating Dora or Diego for the sake of dessert, each guest can choose his/her favourite animal (I have asked for various animal/dinosaur shaped chocolates to be staked on top of each cupcake) and more importantly, they can bring some home. If I have to eat leftover cupcakes for days after, so is everyone else!! I then went to another shop to order much less elaborate Nut free and Kosher cupcakes with the same theme for her daycare celebration. Nut free because most children centres are nut free zones, you know, to avoid some kid licking the floor going into anaphalectic shock. Kosher because I think one of her little friends is Jewish. I will order the pizza on her birthday itself. I then went to the nearby supermarket to get some crab and shrimp rolls for my lunch. Which made me think about the non-kosher pizza. Should I get some sushi too? Is that kosher? But wait, the rolls have sesame seeds. The last thing I want is to have some kid die at Sash's birthday as that will so get her kicked out of daycare...will ask J how other parents deal with this. I am going to enjoy my Tuesday before it starts snowing again this evening.

Its a sign..

We bought Sash another more user friendly potty. It had to be the Dora potty of course. So now in the basement we have the loo, the insert, and the potty that can also be transformed into an insert in the future. I swear if she takes a leak in this potty she can have any Dora item she wants for the rest of her life. We bought the reward stickers too as we have been advised that bribery works pretty well in the training process. Chocolates were recommended but D tends to hog the supply. The only problem now is that every time we suspect that she is having a poo/pee, we start rushing about like headless chickens getting her undressed and on the loo/insert/Dora pooper that we literally scare the shit into her...not the figurative shit out of her. Kid is getting constipated. D and I have figured out why people have 2 kids..the first one is the test subject that you sort of screw up and psychologically traumatise with your amateur ineptness, and the second the back up.



We had to rush back from ToysRUs which is 3 blocks away as S, the owner of the gallery where we bought our bedroom painting was on the way to ours with the artist. You see, we have only just realised that the painting was unsigned. We mentioned this to S and he agreed to arrange for the artist Leonard to sign it for us when he is in Toronto, which was today. We finally had a chance to meet the man who painted the first and last thing we see every day, and to thank him for sharing his skill with us. He apologised profusely for his oversight, and explained that he sometimes takes a while to figure out where to place his signature, that he puts off his decision and does not get back to it before the piece is sold. We reassured him that in view of the beautiful work that he did finish, the lack of signature is a minor issue. We told him how that we love his painting because it is a "snapshot" of the Great Lakes landscape which is so beautiful that no one can ever replicate its beauty on canvas, yet his canvas reminds us of the beauty within the heigtened reality of a dream. Even his technique of layering thin layers of oil is unique to us. He probably thought we were full of the stuff that we are trying to get into Dora pooper, but he was very nice about it. It must be strange though that this may be the last time he will ever see this painting that he spent quite a bit of time on. As he finished his signature, he said "There, it is done".



While he was doing this, Sash was going around looking for eggs. Yup, she thinks we have kept EB hostage and we will have egg hunts all year round. And yes, she is still wearing yesterday's outfit. We had a little bath time issue last night...seems all her clothes are "MINE!! Stop, stop, Mine!!" so we cant take them off...ah well, saves me from doing the laundry...

Easter treats:Part Deux

Other than the fact that we are in a choc/blueberry pie induced coma, while Sash is on a sugar high, it is just another perfect Sunday...

Easter treats

Easter weekend started on the Friday for us, where we found this parked across the street. We now know how the bunny gets around...



I spent the morning looking for some plastic eggs and chocolate bunnies for Sash's first egg hunt (And before I get nasty comments, I celebrate any holiday that involves chocolate). I was not about to boil and paint eggs, mainly because I hate the taste of hard boiled eggs and also I am not keen on having some random stray egg stinking up the house months later. After stocking up on those essential items, we headed out to L's for a play date. S, L's dot had taken out her toys to share, and R was there with W. V, my immediate neighbour popped by but had left S her 9 month old son with his new nanny. She is starting work soon and has hired a nanny as it is not that much more than full time day care. Also, as a lawyer, she will not be able to pick up S at 5.30 sharp and if she adds up the overtime at $1-2 a minute, the nanny was the only way to go. She is worried though that S will not be able to have playdates with the non-nanny charges as there is some unwritten code that Mums have play groups among Mums, while Nannies have their own playgroups. Something to do with dynamics. Reeks of some form of -ism to me. I had warned L that I am semi-human before my morning Java so she had asked R, her husband, to make the coffee. She does not drink coffee. Huh? How is this possible? He also baked some loaves of bread for us to take home. And was the bread ever so delicious. I took some home for D, who asked if R knitted. I asked him why he was asking. He said that if he did he was going to march across the street to slap the man...making all the other husbands look bad. As it is, he religiously shovels the sidewalk, remodelled their kitchen himself, and looks damn good in tights (he was in the ballet). I told D I will ask L about the knitting..

On Saturday we decided to check out the Dinosaur exhibition at the ROM. We loved it. The ROM is so child friendly, with an excellent discovery centre where they can pretend to be paleontologists, dress up in costumes, touch fossils, and play with tea sets at the same time. Sash had to show Dini some of his ancestors...





The also have a tee pee in the discovery area where of course D was invited to play do-do...I was left outside taking the pics...



This morning, we woke up to glorious sun shine and the smell of coffee. I made a batch of blueberry pancakes and we had the egg hunt after breakfast. We then went to the local bakery to get some blueberry pie that I have been craving. We plan to just veg out and eat rubbish all day. Sash is still enthralled with her stash. I thought of asking her to share some of her chocs, but as you can see, I don't really need to pad the tummy more than it already is..cant believe I am 18 weeks already...halfway there baby, halfway there..

I am changing pediatricians. I have been lucky enough to find one which is 2 blocks away and accepting new patients. When I called Sash's current pediatrician to request that her records be transferred, I was asked why we wanted the change. I just told them that we felt we needed someone who better understood our situation. I didn't feel like telling the receptionist that her boss just got on my nerves. It all stemmed from my query about Sash's lack of appetite. She really does not eat at home. Apparently, she eats her lunch at daycare, I suppose because she mimics everyone else. At home though we are lucky if we get 2 chicken nuggets and some pasta in her. When I say some, I mean we count by strands. 10 strands of spaghetti is good, 5 is normal. If we are very lucky, she will eat a couple of slices of cucumber. And this is for the whole day. She survives on milk. Her eating habits have been driving me up the wall for a while. Sometimes, on a good day I just resign myself to the fact that at least she eats well 3 lunches a week at daycare and milk is considered a solid, and all is well, for me. On bad days I get upset and force her to eat her 1 chicken nugget under threats of my leaving the room or no TV. On seriously bad days I shout at her while she cries. The level of shouting and tantrums thrown by myself and Sash are usually dependant on the amount of sleep we both have. Sash has been getting up either at midnight or 3am, or 3am and 6am asking for milk. She is hungry but refuses to eat, so milk sustains her at night. Sash I think is like me...I do not handle lack of sleep very well. Usually, when D is around he takes on either the 3am or 6am milk run, sometimes both. He can also sense when I am just about to lose it and takes over coaxing Sash to eat, or just whisks her away so I can cool down. So it is very hard when D is away, as he is now. Therefore, when the pediatrician suggested that I try to be more imaginative with Sash's menu I just absolutely LOST IT. Does he have any idea how many toddler recipe books I have? The bags and bags of frozen pureed vegetables and fruits I have in the freezer as a result of trying out the "hiding veggies in food" technique? The many many times I spend half an hour preparing a special tasty dish that Sash just rejects in a 1 second mouthful? Does he have any idea how painful it is knowing that your child has only had half a tub of yogurt and half a fish stick the whole day? That she is the bottom 2 percentile weight wise? Does he have to throw food into the compost bin day in day out? Well, I already have enough issues dealing with Sash's baby-rexia to have someone who knows me or my life from Adam suggesting that I am not doing enough. So I ditched him and I have found another one who reassures me that this is just a stage and suggests that I put vitamin supplements in her milk. Sash is thin, but she is healthy and she is active, and that is all that matters. I realise that the old pediatrician was making a valid suggestion, but I feel I need someone to reassure me that all is fine as that way I will maybe lose it less often. I actually feel awful while I am shouting at her, and I know that I am taking out my frustrations as a result of pure fatigue out on this innocent kid, but even as I am feeling the guilt, I cannot stop myself. It just takes a second to trigger off the need to vent. I would never ever hit her of course, but I see the fear in her eyes when I start shouting and that makes me stop. But of course the damage is done. Luckily she has D to turn to for comfort. I have warned D that we need to get her to stop waking up for her milk or else I don't even want to think how I will react to lack of sleep what with meeting the demands of the new baby and Sash. (I was a zombie the first 6 months of Sash's life, and I even remember a few nights when she would wake me up crying yet again and I would think "God I hate this motherhood thing...") I need to ask the new pediatrician how we are going to do this. Friends have asked me how I have come to the decision to only have 2 children? This is because I know myself, and I am mentally and emotionally capable of caring for 2 children at the maximum as I do not have the required patience or temprement to handle more than that. I think if the second one is as fussy an eater as Sash, I will seriously consider medication...for me.

Rainy day

It has been raining for a while. Quite a relief as the rain will melt the snow, and boy do we need the snow to melt. Better for it to melt slowly, over time, than suddenly when the weather gets warmer. If that happens then we will be able to test how waterproof our basement is.

I was planning to head downtown to get a few things, such as a maternity swimsuit, a red top (for a dinner we are attending with the Bono Red theme) and a waffle maker. However, in view of rather dreary weather, I think I will just look for my swimwear and red top around here, and postpone my quest for a waffle maker closer to Sasha's birthday party. The only reason I am looking for a waffle maker is to make waffles for Sasha's birthday brunch. D and I decided that we will just have the neighbourhood gang over for brunch (yes, I know, again) and cake to celebrate Sasha's birthday. She is, as you may be aware, only a 2 year old that we have raised to have low expectations of us and as we have many more years of birthdays where clowns (I personally hate them, I find them creepy and my mind cannot differentiate a clown mask from the mask worn by Jason in Friday the 13th) and bouncy castles may be the order of the day we are keeping it simple, extremely simple. If she is lucky, she may get some balloons from the Party Shop round the corner. Not too many as we have to maintain the low expectations. Luckily for me, Mr Maximalist-anything-for-my-uber-cutest-baby-girl-in-the-Universe will be at a conference until Friday night, so I will be able to implement my Minimalist-because-you-are-too-young-to-care-or-be-eternally-grateful-to-me-your-life-giver decor for Saturday's brunch. Orange juice, coffee, scrambled eggs, waffles and bagels have been well tried and truly tested, so if the formula aint broke....


Yesterday, R, W's Mum called and asked if Sash could go over to theirs to play. L was going to be there with S. I had been trying to put Sash to bed for a couple of hours. She did not want to take her nap but she sat in her bed for 2 hours flipping through her Dora books (at times like this I truly deeply love my child....). So I figured why not. We went over, had cheese and crackers, talked about baby names, summer maternity clothes (I have already bought my maternity shorts and tank tops), nasty tent-like maternity swimwear (taking their advice, I will forgo maternity swimsuits and get a bikini that has a low rise bottom), babysitters etc while the kids played, hit each other, cried, apologized, did cute things...the usual. While R, who is extremely waspy, chatted about her answering the phone in Mandarin (she worked in Taiwan before), L apologized as she had to get S home to feed her dins and she herself had to get ready for a show..she was modelling in Toronto Fashion Week last night. After she left, R groaned about putting on weight and how it must be great to be a model. I told her I gave up my life long ambition of becoming a supermodel after I turned 18 and realized that no amount of starving myself would make me shoot up from 5'2 to 5'11. I decided then that law school was my fall back. We had a good laugh and I went home to bung dinner in the microwave and toss a salad. Tomorrow we have another playtime at L's. She has invited everyone over at 9am. I told her that I will come over on condition that she have coffee ready. I am semi-human before my first cup of Java.

I like my neighbours. They are a fun group. Having moved around quite a bit, we are very much aware of how lucky we are to have such a great bunch of people in the vicinity. Having said that, we cant attribute it to luck alone. My old friend asked me during lunch last weekend how we decided to settle in this neighbourhood. TO is such a vibrant and diverse cultural city that any new settler has a multitude of types of neighbourhoods to settle in, about 140 known neighbourhoods in the city itself. Lets not talk about the many many outlying suburbs where admittedly you can get more square footage for your Canadian dollar. You can spend your life looking for a house. How did we luck out? Well, we did alot of groundwork and research. D had lived here during his student days so he roughly knew where he did not want to live. This is also the GTA, which is the 5th most congested region in North America, with 5.5 million currently, and expected to rise another 2.5 within the next 10-20 years. It has the 5th most congested roads in North America, with LA in the lead. We knew we had to compromise space and all spare cash for convenience. The look of a house you can change with a good builder, location is invariable. We wanted to be near public transport. We especially looked extremely closely at demographics, including age, gender, ethnicity, household income, education levels. While we wanted to live within the culture and diversity, we did not want to do this at the expense of safety and Sash's educational opportunities. We narrowed our list down to 4 neighbourhoods only, and with a list of requirements and measly budget, directed our agent to only look at houses within these neighbourhoods. We were in the States then, so you can imagine what a pain it was to have to head up to TO, spend a couple of nights in a hotel, look at 10 houses in one session (after rejecting 3 times as many from the list emailed to us by our agent) dragging Sash in and out of the car the whole day, and repeating this over the course of a few months. As with all aspects of life, luck also came into play. Our home came on the market at the right time, we had a kick-ass agent who clinched the deal (and trust me, we have dealt with some dodgy agents) and the neighbours we have correspond to the demographic charts we relied on rather heavily. I think we have all gravitated towards each other because we are all in the same boat, yuppies in a previous life, now with 1.5 kids, having taken on an astronomical mortgage and therefore having to economize (Vintage for kids is a badge of honour), trying to get as much adult conversation yet still conversing about our child infused life, basically just getting a grip of how our lives have changed even before we were able to say "Huh? What the..." . Now you can imagine why the thought of possibly moving again just makes me sick....

Question of the day

Does washing down my pre-natal vitamin with coffee nullify the benefits of the vitamin, or the alleged ill effects of the caffeine?


Sasha is speaking in full sentences now, which is great because now we can have conversations. For example, this morning:

Sash: Daddy, where soothie go/Mum, where paci go? (She is semi-bilingual...she speaks Canadian and proper English at home)

Us: I don't know. Lets go look.

Sash: Okaaaaay (sighing). We go downstairs?

Us: We have to change your diaper first.

Sash: NO Diaper! No diaper!(And then while on the changing table) Cream, cream!

(Now downstairs) Sash: There's paci, under the couch. Thats mine. Carry you, carry you. (Which means carry me)

Us: Sash, we have to put on your ski suit now, we have to go to daycare.

Sash: Outside! Outside. Thats my boots. Mum, where shovel go? Where Dini?

Us: Dini has to dodo upstairs Ok. Here is you shovel.

Sash: Thank you. Bye Mum.

We had an old secondary school (high school) friend over for lunch yesterday. She lives in a suburb north east of Toronto with her husband and 3 sons. She is also preggers and her fourth child is due approximately 2 weeks before PD's ETD. We had lunch at her's before Christmas so it is ironic that we were both sitting at her dining table then wholly unaware that we were both preggers. She is hoping for a girl, and after spending the day with 3 very well behaved yet boisterous boys aged 7,5 and 3, we are rethinking the whole wanting a boy issue. They are a different breed altogether. We are also now THOROUGHLY CONVINCED that 2 is the LIMIT. Well, for me 2 has always been the maximum, and I would have been happy with Sash, but D was as yet uncertain...hmmm, maybe we should have had the boys over for lunch last November. He was so affected that he called his Dad to ask how having 7 kids did not drive him absolutely insane...hahahaha..FIL said "What makes you think I'm not?". Having said that, Sash was having a grand old time trying to keep up with the big boys (and yes sweetie, you will be doing this your whole life), wanting to mimic their every action during our walk to the park after lunch, from throwing snowballs into the stream to jumping into every puddle she came across. She was so taken with them that she even tried to get into their minivan as they were leaving...and to think we were worried about her socialization at one point.

We are planning to meet up again, hopefully soon. Probably during the Summer after we have both delivered. Her Mum will be flying in from USJ (a suburb outside KL)to help with her confinement, and as she will be confined at home for the duration, we will be the ones going to hers as I will not be allowed outdoors. If all goes as well as Sash's delivery, we will be back in Sherwood Park for our walks as soon as PD is home. She did ask me what I am doing confinement wise, and she seemed surprised that I am not following the traditional route in that regard. I, on the other hand, found it rather curious that she would be going through all that trouble and expense to stick to a tradition which really is only practicable if one has the required support system (cook, masseuse, nanny etc). She asked me if I wanted her Mum to get me some massage oils and herbal baths for me. I had to decline nicely and explain (again nicely) that it would be slightly challenging for me to entertain Sash, take care of the newborn, and still take time for a herbal bath. And I really don't have the time, or inclination, to take a "Massage yourself" class. Very sweet of her to offer though. She also asked if I am at least restricting my food intake to confinement food. As I have no idea what the heck confinement food is (apparently contains lots of ginger to heat the body), my food intake will be restricted to the many restaurants in the area that deliver, preferably sashimi or penne arrabiatta, and as for the heating the body issue, it will be in the middle of August for Gods sake..nature will heat my body fine. I get the feeling that she disapproves of my non-conforming to appropriate post-natal behaviour. I however would rather poke my eyes out with blunt wooden chopsticks than eat ginger infused bland food while under house arrest at the height of Summer. Ok, maybe I will relent slightly and check out the Shiatsu massage center round the corner.

During lunch, we were chatting about the boys' personalities. Friend's hubby mentioned that while on a Disney cruise they took a few years ago, the boys were asked to pick one toy. The eldest chose a Minnie doll, while the other 2 chose Mickey dolls. Hubby tried to persuade eldest son to choose a Mickey instead. He refused. Hubby is relieved though that eldest son recognizes that his choice may have been sissy-fied (in his own words) and he only sleeps with Minnie when he is alone and hides it in the closet when visitors are about. I generally do not criticize anyone for their parental strategies, but I just laughed and said that it is strange that he would think that way. If it were my son, I would be much happier that he sleep with Minnie than Mickey. Heck, a Barbie would even be better. I just said this on a lark, but I think Hubby plans to go straight home and hide the Mickey dolls. D told me later that night, as we were having our hot cocoa, that PD can sleep with a cross-dressing baboon doll for all he cares. Just as long as he never feels the need to hide it from anyone....